What Mihri Taught Me

Mihri lifts her shirt revealing a track of wide scars that criss-cross over and around her entire torso. It is the first time I have met her, but she is eager to tell her story to a sympathetic ear. She is a wife and a mother of two. She brought her kids to the children's meeting that morning for the first time and is now sitting with me at the women's Bible study. After years of health problems, she tells me, she had major surgery and as a result cannot tolerate gluten and needs a special diet. After her surgery she came back home to her husband and his family, but suffered extensive abuse at the hands of her brother in law and her family was forced to move because of it.

Abuse of this kind is not uncommon here, in fact recently a woman was stabbed in the next village over by an angry brother in law seeking revenge.

Mihri escaped such a fate, however. Her family came to Malisheve to start anew, but then her husband was struck by a car while crossing the street. He survived, but hasn't been the same since. He cannot work, so Mihri is searching for a job for herself. In the mean time her family is living in a tiny apartment at the edge of town and buys groceries with the small pension they receive.

"How can I buy food for four people with only 30 Euros a month?!" she nearly cries to me, "My kids live off of bread and tea... I need gluten-free flour, but it is very expensive, you can't even find it here in town, so I eat corn and rice..." We pray together and I think it means a lot to her to have someone listen who cares.

Another day when we go to visit Mihri, this time in her home, she insists on letting my little daughter have the one pretty thing in her house, a pair of knitted potholders that she made herself. There are only so many times I can refuse without being rude, so I finally accept, inwardly shamed by her humble generosity in the face of poverty (what mountains of silly things do I hoard with fierce jealousy?) Maybe a shoulder to cry on meant more to her than I can know.

I am also encouraged by her attitude and actions, and think vaguely of the stories of the widow's mite and the rich young ruler. Counting the cost has been a recurring topic lately in our family discussions as well as the wider discussions of the Church group. What are we willing to give up, more importantly what are we called to give up? What does this mean at its core? In what ways does it practically apply to our lives? All questions we have been mulling and studying over. But the next time I feel myself clinging to some worldly trinket, I hope I'll remember Jesus words to a foolish young man -a man uncomfortably similar to all of us- and think of Mihri pushing her potholders into my daughter's hands as her children dip bread in their tea.

Autumn

We are now officially into fall and it may interest you to know that this is the first Autumn in our entire 8 1/2 year marriage that I have not been pregnant or had an infant in my arms. Well, hey, it's significant to me. What I do have is 4 incredibly spunky, silly, hilarious kiddos running circles around me, and I am very content with that at the moment. (Though, not gonna lie, I was looking through some of the girls' baby pics today and it definitely made me feel a bit nostalgic. Like, maybe I'd love to have another baby sometime, nostalgic, haha :) )

Anyway, September has been beautiful for us so far, lots of those long golden days I love. However there was so much rain this summer that many of the crops which should be being harvested now did not do well. Among those are grapes, plums, tomatoes, and potatoes. On the other hand it was a good year for corn and peppers, in fact today I got to sample some corn on the cob fresh from the fields, although here the majority of the corn harvest is reserved for livestock. We spent part of our day in the village today and the girls got to help gather walnuts that their uncles beat out of the trees with long sticks. Then they played in the leaf piles while Gjagji Rifat swept the yard (ever tried sweeping a yard free of leaves on a blustery day? It's totally fun and great exercise. I know because I helped like a little tiny bit.) And helped their Gjysha make pite for dinner.

We have actually spent the last couple days out in the village helping with and enjoying the wedding festivities of one of Hasan's neighbors, the older brother of one of my dear friends. It was such a joy to participate in and it is always fun and interesting to witness the particular traditions surrounding marriage in this culture.

In Albanian culture there are two kinds of wedding celebrations, both lasting over several days. There's the Kanagjegj -the festivities of the family giving away their daughter as a bride, a relatively sad affair as they are essentially "losing" a daughter- and the Darsma -the joyful event of receiving a bride into the family.

Beautiful Aferdite in her traditional bridal outfit, in the center. I'm looking forward to getting to know her better.

The third day of the darsma celebration is Dita Grave, meaning "women's day," when all the women of the village gather to pay their respects to the bride.

The women sing traditional songs to welcome her.

The bride is led out of the house for all to admire, as sugar is scattered on the ground before her so that her life may be sweet and later she participates in a traditional dance.

The bride is not supposed to smile, but to keep a very straight face. (That's my adorable friend Ymrije on the bride's right, there, who was also recently married :) ) Also, in a Kosovo wedding other younger women are to dress in their bridal cloths or fancy dresses as well for this celebration, so different from our own western traditions!

Another highlight of the month was getting to bring one of the young women in our Church to the Udheqryq Bible School in Erseka, Albania.

Sweet Drenusha and Adelina pose during a rest stop at a mall in Tirana

Lake Ohrid 

Finally, we're here! The Bible School's looking pretty spiffy these days :)

It's about an 8 hour trip down, but the scenery is amazing even if the roads are difficult -and it is well worth the switchbacks and pot holes to get to visit with our Erseka family there. A day and a half was faaar too short a time to spend with them, though we were blessed nonetheless. The group of students this year is diverse and dynamic and we pray that they will have a great year growing in the knowledge and grace of the Lord.

Bekime! (Blessings!)